Thursday, August 11, 2011

Ramblings on Friendship


There comes a time in your life when you start to realize who is really there for you and who is not. I feel like that time has come for me. I have put myself out there and tried to be there for many people to only get stomped on or crushed. I call or text or facebook people who say they are my friends only to not get a response back or to feel like they are only hanging out because they feel obligated to.

I feel like now is the time to step back and wait for them to make the same effort that I have. It should never be one sided. No one should ever make you feel like you are second best. When you are friends with someone they should put just as much effort into said friendship as you do.

Call me selfish, but I want the type of friendship where you have to call each other at least once a day or your texting each other all day long for no apparent reason. I want the type of friendship that comes with truly being friends with someone because you like them for who they are.

I am tired of the one way street. I have plenty of “friends” who say hi now and again, who want to hang out every once in a while. I have those friends who you do not talk to for months on end, or even years and when we do talk it is like no time has passed us at all, we just pick up right where we left off.

Sometimes that just is not enough. I have plenty of friends, but I guess you can say what I am truly wanting is a best friend. Someone who takes the time to get to know me and breaks down the walls I have built to keep people at arm’s length. Someone who realizes that I have trust issues and doesn’t mind shoving those issues aside because they understand why I have those issues.

Some might say, “what about your husband?” To which I say, “what about him?” He is my friend, my partner, my everything, but that is not the type of friend I am talking about here. I love him with all my heart and nothing will change that reality. The person I am talking about here is someone whom my husband would accept and be friends with also.

So I want to know, who is your best friend? Or if you do not really have one, what is your experience with this? Have you ever found yourself in this situation before?