Sunday, July 1, 2012

4. Meaning Behind My Blog’s Name

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I actually went kicking and screaming into Capturing Life’s Magick. For those who remember, I used to be …Create Yourself…

For personal reason I took that blog down and took a hiatus from the blogging world. The entire reason I got into blogging was because I was looking for a creative outlet to rekindle my love of writing. I used to write daily from  short stories, to poems (I even was published in a book for one of poems). I used to love journaling a lot.

Unfortunately my privacy was violated to the highest degree. My grandmother (who raised me) watched a Dr. Phill episode that told her to go through your children’s diary and see what they were up to. So she did. Well she did not like what I had to say so she wrote me a letter in my own diary telling how wrong I was to feel that way.

She didn’t even try to hide the fact that she broke into my diary (the lock was broken). I also got grounded for what I wrote in there for 2 weeks. It took me months to pick up my journal and try writing in it again. When I finally did, the next day there was another letter in there from my grandmother telling yet again why I was wrong and again I got grounded for my thoughts for another 2 weeks.

I quit writing all together after that. Even my English professor in high school noticed that my heart was no longer into the words I wrote. I mourned writing. I no longer felt the creative outlet it provided me.

When I moved out of my parents house I immediately went out and bought a really nice journal so I could start freely documenting my life again. It was slow going because I had shut it out for so long that I didn’t know how to open up anymore. Not even to myself.

Finally I got back into the swing of things. It was great. I was remembering why I loved writing again. I couldn’t wait to get home and write in my journal all the adventures that happened to me throughout the day.

Then one day I went to work and forgot to put my journal away. My then boyfriend at the time took that as an invitation to read my journal. Wouldn’t you know it…he left me a letter in my journal too! Granted all it said was “I love you too”, but that was enough for me. I couldn’t do it. I shut back down and quit writing again.

It wasn’t until I met my now husband and moved an hour away from my friends and family that I was introduced to the blogging world. My friend Robin got me set up with my very first very short lived blogger account. It was called “A Muses Contemplations”, which eventually became …capturing life… blog.

When …capturing life… “died” for me was because someone in my real life was using my blog as cannon fodder to harass me. It so bad I actually wondered if blogging was even worth it for me any more or not.

My husband reminded me that I was blogging for the world to see and that it was also so friends and family could keep up with our lives. He suggested to create a new blog and cut those people out of my life who were harassing me.

Since I was creating a whole new blog from scratch after almost 2 years of blogging and making a name for myself. I wanted a name I would stick with no matter what the future held. I wanted it to represent who I was and who I would become.

Capturing Life’s Magick represents my photography, my life, and my religion. It is my daily reminder to remember to capture life’s magick and never let it go.

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